


Still Here, Eddie

by Okadiah



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Venom (Movie 2018)
Genre: Bodysharing, Depression, Movie Spoilers, Spoilers, ends on a high note though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-07
Updated: 2018-10-07
Packaged: 2019-07-27 20:02:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16226336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Okadiah/pseuds/Okadiah
Summary: SPOILERS FOR THE MOVIEEddie thinks about the mess the last few days of his life had become. How, now that it's over, he can't feel Venom anymore.And just how much the symbiote's absence hurts.





	Still Here, Eddie

**Author's Note:**

> If you missed the previous warnings, here it is one final time. THERE ARE SPOILERS for the movie in this. Like, a lot of them. You've been warned.
> 
> I just really wanted to explore that moment after the ship blows up and what might have gone through Eddie's mind when he 'loses' Venom. I haven't read the comics (yet), and I've only seen the movie once so sorry for any OOCness. Anyway, enjoy!

Eddie shivered from under the blanket a paramedic had given him after he'd been fished out of the water. He stared at the dark, glossy ripple of the ocean which only heightened the orange burn of wreckage that still hadn't gone out after the ship carrying Riot and Drake exploded, thanks to him and Venom.

Venom.

He clenched his fists, his thoughts both racing and coming to an abrupt halt. Torn between what had happened and the knowledge of what it meant.

Sure. It had only been a couple of days since Venom, well, _bonded_ with him as a host, but Eddie had always been a quick learner, even if he hadn't been very smart about what he did with the knowledge he gathered. After just a few days, and more deadly encounters than he could honestly say he'd ever experienced in the entirety of his life, he felt certain he knew a thing or two about the bond he'd shared with Venom. Maybe not everything, but enough.

At the very least, Eddie knew how the symbiote felt.

Feel. That was a crazy way of putting it. Venom had been under his skin. No, not even there. He had sunk deeper. Deeper than bone and blood. Maybe even deeper than neurons and electrical pulses and everything that made Eddie, well, Eddie. Venom had been like a shadow on his mind and in his movements. Distinctive. Intentional. Aware. But the alien had also been a part of him. Something Eddie could sense. Could literally, figuratively, metaphorically, whatever-ally _feel_.

And what was driving him up the wall was that, although all he'd wanted since this mess began was for Venom to be gone, now he _couldn't_ feel the symbiote. Couldn't feel that foreign flow of energy, thought, action that layered and permeated everything about him.

Eddie kept closing his eyes, focusing his mind like Mrs. Chen's stupid tapes kept telling him to do. He kept searching inward, searching every fiber of his being, every corner of his mind.

Venom wasn't there. Just the last thing the alien had said, echoing around in his head.

**_Goodbye, Eddie._ **

A shout burst out of his throat and he jumped when a hand slipped on his shoulder, pulling him from the torment of his memories. Slim and warm, the touch was as comforting as Anne ever was, and she looked at him with concern, a question in her eyes. It helped that she was here. That it was her, and not anyone else. A person who knew. Someone who cared.

But with a sinking feeling in his gut, he realized it wasn't the hand he'd wanted.

"You okay?"

Eddie sputtered and grinned, though he knew it didn't reach his eyes. "You know me. I'm like a cockroach. Can't quite get rid of me, though I've gotta say, Drake and Riot gave it one hell of a go."

That was putting it lightly. He could still remember what it felt like when Riot had run him through. He remembered what it was like to feel his life slip away from him, faster than he'd ever thought possible. He remembered the darkness closing in.

Eddie remembered the feel of Venom as the alien found him again, bonded with him again, saved him _again_.

**_Goodbye, Eddie._ **

It amazed him how even the memory of that gravelly voice in his head, a voice he hadn't even wanted, could fill him with so much surprising regret. They'd gone into it together, fully expecting to die. If either of them should have walked away from this mess, it should have been Venom.

And yet, here Eddie was.

"I saw what happened. Or, I saw most of what happened," Anne said as she sat beside him, the familiar warmth of her side pressing against his. "You both stopped him."

"Yeah, we did," Eddie said, and somehow his voice didn't shake. "Sent those assholes right to hell."

Anne's eyes pinched slightly at the edges. "That explosion …" She licked her lips, and for once seemed to struggle with her words. "Venom, that time in the car, you-he said fire could hurt them."

Eddie couldn't hide the strain in his voice this time. "Yeah. He did. That he did."

She wrung her hands in her lap just once before she forced them still.

"Where's Venom?"

Eddie's throat tightened, and the best he could do was shake his head. This was insane, he knew it was insane. Hell, just a few hours earlier he and the alien had been separated and he'd been grateful – _thankful_ even – to be rid of the monster that had barreled in to ruin what little remained of his life. Sure, Venom had saved him, kept him alive, but that was out of survival. Out of necessity. The thing had been an asshole. A human-eating, violent, stubborn asshole whose very existence had tried to kill him. Convinced Eddie for a hot second that he'd finally cracked.

But Venom _had_ kept him safe. He'd helped him, in his own way. He'd helped Eddie come to terms with Anne, and if he was being _really_ honest, the power had been a nice bonus. The instant healing thing had been pretty great too.

Then that stupid alien bastard had to prove that he wasn't as big a bastard as Eddie had thought by helping save Earth. All somehow because of _him_. A loser like Eddie.

And now he was gone.

Eddie hunched over, clenching his eyes shut as he pressed his palms into them too. Stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. _Of course_ this would happen, that was his luck – always his luck. Losing thing. Losing things that mattered.

Anne's warm hand rubbed circles into his back.

"I'm sorry. I know you and Venom were … well. Maybe not friends, but I know you, Eddie. I know you cared."

Eddie chuckled, and even in his ears it sounded tortured.

The paramedic wanted him to go to the hospital, undergo a proper checkup since he'd been so close to the explosion – since he might be in shock – but Eddie refused. The police wanted to talk to him, get his statement on what had happened, but somehow with Anne's help he managed to wave them off too with a promise to stop by and give his statement in the morning.

He didn't remember the drive to Anne's place, nor climbing the stairs before collapsing on her sofa.

He remembered the dreams though. The rush of power and strength as he and Venom destroyed the spaceship. The smell of fuel. The explosion, the fire, the wind. Venom pulling away. Venom a flare of darkness in the blinding light, on fire. The bond between him and the symbiote burning away, like gasoline-soaked tinder.

**_Goodbye, Eddie._ **

Eddie woke up and ran for the bathroom, vomiting before settling back against the wall, exhausted as tears clung to his eyelashes. He shouldn't even have tears to spare for the alien. He shouldn’t _care_ like this.

The cat watched him with stoic indifference before prowling away, and Eddie guessed Anne was right. The cat did hate him.

The next few days went by in a steady blur where his mind was working, but his chest remained numb and quiet. He gave his statement to the police, and it was a long statement, that was for sure, since he finally had the attention of people who _actually_ wanted to believe him this time. Not long after the paper called, wanting to talk to him, wanting him to come in, wanting to give him his job back.

He just wanted to get home and sleep, even though his dreams kept circling on fire. On darkness. On Venom.

As he lay in bed staring at his shitty ceiling a week later, he was struck with the realization that more than anything, he missed the symbiote. And although the world was probably better now that the man-eating monster was gone, and the threat to Earth was pretty much over – so long as the Avengers took care of the other messes – he found he wished that Venom had survived.

It wouldn't even matter if he'd have to host the alien for who knew how long. In retrospect, it hadn't even been that bad. Like having a constant companion. A partner he could trust, mostly, and depend on. Someone who watched his back. A friend.

**_Friend,_** the tiny whisper of a voice said, flitting through his thoughts like smoke. **_We're friends now, Eddie?_**

Disbelief and a flood of hope roared through Eddie as he sat up quickly, a smile spreading across his face.

"Venom?" he said, his voice echoing off the walls of the room. "Come on, Venom, you better be there. This better not be some fucked up joke my mind's making up. The last thing I need is to start imagining you now."

**_Still here, Eddie. Never left,_** Venom said, his voice still very quiet. Very small. **_Almost died, but we survived. It took a long time to recover._** To Eddie's relief, the feel of foreign energy resting in his muscles, in his mind grew stronger. Noticeable. He could _feel_ Venom again. **_But still here, Eddie._**

The strength of Eddie’s smile made his face ache as relief clogged his blood. He laughed. Venom was still alive.

And it was the best feeling he'd experienced in a long time.

"You scared me there, buddy," Eddie said, running a hand through his hair. "Scared the shit out of me."

**_You were worried?_ **

"Let's just say you've grown on me," Eddie breathed, letting himself flop back on the bed. "You're not so bad."

He felt his memories shift, Venom looking through them.

**_You were sad,_** Venom said, voice strengthening. **_You cried, Eddie. For me._**

"Leave a man his dignity, Venom." Eddie closed his eyes, basking in the heady relief which continued to spread through his veins. The sensation of Venom in his being. "I'm still getting used to the idea of liking you."

A soft chuckle curled within his mind. **_It will take more than that to kill me. To kill_ us _, Eddie._**

"Guess so," Eddie agreed. "After all that, we're still here."

**_Yes,_** Venom said, settling again, an echo of relief pulsing out to merge with Eddie’s. **_Still here._**

**Author's Note:**

> You can follow me for more of my Venom content on [my tumblr](https://symbrock-darling.tumblr.com/). I'm taking prompt requests there too, so if you have one, feel free to send an ask!


End file.
